Emotionally maxed out is how Ive been feeling lately....
I'm not being a very nice person to people who have been nothing but nice to me. I'm really trying and hope I'm not pushing everyone away from me. The holiday season isn't helping this any, i'm just so overwhelmed with everything thats going on and has to get done.
So with that said, I'm sorry Ive been a bit emotionally maxed out and sorry if Ive offended anyone. The new year is just around the corner and can only bring new beginnings.
~I'm working on setting up a blog dedicated to my journey, stay tuned.
Thank Heaven for Little Satvedi Boys
Friday, November 29, 2013
Tuesday, November 26, 2013
Friendship
Friendship is a relationship of mutual affection between two people, or more. One can be an associate but friendship requires and interpersonal bond. People who are involved in close friendships are happier, studies prove. There are many different forms of friendships. A good friendship may include some of the following, affection, sympathy, empathy, honesty, selflessness, mutual understanding, compassion, enjoyment of each others company, trust and the ability to be oneself, express ones feelings and make mistakes without the fear of judgement from the other.
How many friendships like this does one need? I can count on one hand people i can truly call friends based on these qualities. i have a lot of 'friends' but, real friendships are far and few between. A lot of false promises, and realization when things really get tough. I keep my close friends close and i feel so blessed and thankful to have them, and in return i think I'm a pretty great friend.
Phone photo Dump
Okay so i take pictures and videos of the boys everyday all the time. I finally decided to put the photos on my computer. Here are just a few from the past few weeks.
Micah with his animals
Jaden and the boys at the Children's Museum
We spent the afternoon painting, yes that's paint on Noah's face.
A cold afternoon waiting for Micah to arrive on the bus from school.
Trying on Mamas boots
My new super dorky glasses. I hate choosing new ones, so i let the girls do it for me.
Sunday, November 24, 2013
Tis the Season
Tis the season..... So if I'm honest I'm not really feeling the holidays this year. Its all coming so fast and soon. Today i decided to try and change my attitude. The boys and i put a lot of time into decorating the house for Christmas. We also decorated some gingerbread men. Micah had an assignment for school so i decided to make it an activity for all the boys.
The elf has returned (the boys will find him in the morning) he even has his 'Christmas pj's from last year on.
Micah wouldn't let me take his picture
Jo's gingerbread man
Micah's gingerbread man
Noah's gingerbread man ( i know kind of scary!)
My thanksgiving board, every time Micah walks by he has something to say about my turkey, i never said i was an artist.
Saturday, November 23, 2013
Today was a polka dot sock kind of day...
Today was a polka dot sock kind of day... It was freezing outside so i was not about to bundle the boys and try to venture out. So we baked and decorated cookies. A lot of frosting was eaten right out of the bowl.
(Ive gotten a lot of input about my sock wearing boots, some like some could pass but for now they stay.)
Thursday, November 21, 2013
Today was an interesting day....
Today was an interesting day...
I love my boys to pieces but for some reason all 3 of them decided that they would give me a hard time. With that being said ALL 3 of them are already in bed and it's only 6:50.
Micah started the morning by deciding that he would not like the shirt that he had picked out to wear because it was to close to his neck (ummm ok...) He then proceeded to try on multiple shirts before i finally told him no more choices this is what you're wearing. Needless to say he marched off to school not very happy with me.
Josiah didnt mind what he was wearing thankfully but he did mind every meal choice. He demanded snacks all day long and when he did not receive them he proceeded to cry and tantrum. I thought for sure by dinner he would be so hungry he would just eat but, nope he wouldnt touch his dinner. He did drink his milk so i guess its a semi win.
Then you have Noah, so sweet an innocent. (not really but we'll pretend)
From my understanding the two littles were very well behaved for the sitter this afternoon, i guess it was just mommy they wanted to make trouble for.
Tonight while i was making dinner and trying to talk to Michelle on the phone (yes i needed to talk to her it was a bout important stuff), the boys did nothing but fight. The fought over everything, the toilet (we have 5 bathrooms in this house and they all have to use the same one!), the bar stools and even a balloon. I had a semi fail moment when i had, had enough of the fighting over the balloon that i took and popped it. i know some people may say i traumatized the boys (yes, this caused even more crying, but in my defense only a few mins where as if they had still had the balloon it could have gone on for days). Everyone tells me oh that's just boys being boys but come on can't this mama catch a break?
Ok, that's my vent for today, tomorrow is pre-school registration at 7am (I'm going to go by a drop bagels for all those poor teachers who have to work in the morning and deal with the crazy mommies that have been waiting out there since 5am) I'm sure I'll get some good laughs from that :)
(I'm not mean i just need to laugh a little after the few days I've had)
I love my boys to pieces but for some reason all 3 of them decided that they would give me a hard time. With that being said ALL 3 of them are already in bed and it's only 6:50.
Micah started the morning by deciding that he would not like the shirt that he had picked out to wear because it was to close to his neck (ummm ok...) He then proceeded to try on multiple shirts before i finally told him no more choices this is what you're wearing. Needless to say he marched off to school not very happy with me.
Josiah didnt mind what he was wearing thankfully but he did mind every meal choice. He demanded snacks all day long and when he did not receive them he proceeded to cry and tantrum. I thought for sure by dinner he would be so hungry he would just eat but, nope he wouldnt touch his dinner. He did drink his milk so i guess its a semi win.
Then you have Noah, so sweet an innocent. (not really but we'll pretend)
From my understanding the two littles were very well behaved for the sitter this afternoon, i guess it was just mommy they wanted to make trouble for.
Tonight while i was making dinner and trying to talk to Michelle on the phone (yes i needed to talk to her it was a bout important stuff), the boys did nothing but fight. The fought over everything, the toilet (we have 5 bathrooms in this house and they all have to use the same one!), the bar stools and even a balloon. I had a semi fail moment when i had, had enough of the fighting over the balloon that i took and popped it. i know some people may say i traumatized the boys (yes, this caused even more crying, but in my defense only a few mins where as if they had still had the balloon it could have gone on for days). Everyone tells me oh that's just boys being boys but come on can't this mama catch a break?
Ok, that's my vent for today, tomorrow is pre-school registration at 7am (I'm going to go by a drop bagels for all those poor teachers who have to work in the morning and deal with the crazy mommies that have been waiting out there since 5am) I'm sure I'll get some good laughs from that :)
(I'm not mean i just need to laugh a little after the few days I've had)
Monday, November 18, 2013
Monday fun Day!
Monday fun day, is what i used to say in my classroom to get my students ready for the week. Is it really that fun after all??? Places to be people to see. Our home is always running a bit slow on Monday morning. Boys begging for donuts because i haven't baked muffins or cinnamon rolls because I'm to tired. Can't they enjoy a bowl of cereal on Mondays? None the less the boys are fed and dressed and we're out of the house by 8am. We head straight to drop Josiah off at school. I have to be one of the first few cars in the drop off line or Micah will miss his bus. At 8:30 they drag limp Josiah out of the car. I start to pull away as the door is still closing reminding Josiah i love him and i'll be back soon, his response... pick me up early! Then it's Micahs turn. We drive straight to the bus stop where, i unload Micah. There are a handful of children already waiting. The bus arrives promptly (not really) at 8:44. Micah rushed to hug me and asks for kissing hands just in case he misses me during the day. As he climbs the big stairs with his heavy bag i remind him i'll be in his class for Book Bag this morning. Last but not least since it's Monday its Noahs turn. I head back over to downtown Naperville to drop Noah for his CDO program. He goes in joyfully and sweetly says 'Bye.'
At this point i climb back into my car and just sit in silence. After the crazy morning rush the silence is greatly needed.
Then at 9:30 i head over to Micah's school where i sign in and head to the room. I pull out about 15 children 1 at a time and review word lists or read simple books for about 5-10 mins each. I love being with the children, then my child comes out and is completely disappointed that I'm in HIS school. I remind him that i told him it was Monday and i would be there. He then refuses to work me, i then tell him ok, please go get the next student. (mommy doesn't want to take her stress out on you in the hallway of your school)
Normally after that i head home and do house work and all that fun stuff. Today i decided i would make it a fun day even if it only lasted for an hour. It was my turn.... I went and got a pedi, now if you know me even just a little you know i HATE feet. I rather them be covered with socks, and not just mine but everyone's. I know i know i'm going to work on that with my therapist too. With that said i stepped outside the box and now have beautiful purple toes (that no one will ever see because they'll be tucked inside warm socks).
I then headed home and made an appointment for Saturday, a much needed appointment!!!
Then it was time to pick up the 2 little boys. I always head to get Noah first. It's not time to actually get him until 1 but since thats the same time i get Jo, Noah gets picked up early. Today i received a special treat, just as i was pulling out of the parking lot there she was.... Cassie. Just at that very perfect moment she flags me down and tells me to pull over. I stop my car and feel blessed to have her, she comes over to my car with flowers and a bottle of wine (i think shes trying to turn me into a drinker, but a glass of wine is just what i need at the end of my long days). We then chat and i feel even better than i did before.
I arrive at Jo's school with just 10 mins before dismissal, of course Noah is tired and doesn't want to get out of the car. He arches his back and screams NO Mommy NO!!!! I gently remind him we have to pick JoJo up from school. I head into the school with a screaming child trying to throw himself from my arms. When we arrive outside Jo's class i set my tantruming child on the floor and start conversations with other mothers. (yes i was that mom today, but i didn't really care because i have pretty purple toes) First thing Jo says is i have to pee. I think, really you couldn't have used the potty in your class (my reasoning for this request is simple) the potty is at the front door but Jo only likes to exit through the back door. Doesn't he see how crazy the hallway is??? and that his brother is freaking out??? I meet his request because i don't want two tantruming children on my hands.
We arrive home, i put Noah down for a nap, and start to make Jo lunch. How i wish my kids would eat a cold sandwich (i know i know its my fault and i shouldn't let my children make that choice). Jo finishs lunch and starts quiet time. (its never really that quiet but he knows that its my time) Today i choose to blog during this time. Therefore my house is a mess. I have laundry waiting to be folded and dinner to be started, not to mention the mess in the toy room...oh and the workout that's not happening today. It's never ending and always calling my name. Atleast as i fold the laundry i'll have my beautiful flowers to look at. I'll start dinner just before heading to the bus to get Micah.
Once all 3 boys are home thats when the house really gets loud. Dinner will be serves no later than 5:30 and we'll be headed for tubs at 6:15. Someone will end up sad and/or hurt, never fails. I may even have to pull someone out for a somewhat cold timeout. A mamas gotta do what a mamas gotta do. By 6:45 i have 3 very naked little boys running around telling me to catch them. If ive already put lotion on them this can be a difficult task. By 7, everyone's been wrangled and dressed. We sit and read a chapter from our favorite book or play a game. Noah may even request i read him the instructions to the game.
By 7:15 Noahs in bed, and the other 2 boys follow at 7:30. This doesn't mean they wont come in my room 10 times before actually falling asleep. I will then once again sit down and enjoy the silence. I just started reading a new book so a few chapter of that helps (after the musical on Saturday i think i need to start reading 50 shades of gray). That's it no more no less.
You may ask yourself, does she proof this before she posts it.... the answer is NO, if you don't like it, don't read it :) Have a great day, enjoy your Monday!
At this point i climb back into my car and just sit in silence. After the crazy morning rush the silence is greatly needed.
Then at 9:30 i head over to Micah's school where i sign in and head to the room. I pull out about 15 children 1 at a time and review word lists or read simple books for about 5-10 mins each. I love being with the children, then my child comes out and is completely disappointed that I'm in HIS school. I remind him that i told him it was Monday and i would be there. He then refuses to work me, i then tell him ok, please go get the next student. (mommy doesn't want to take her stress out on you in the hallway of your school)
Normally after that i head home and do house work and all that fun stuff. Today i decided i would make it a fun day even if it only lasted for an hour. It was my turn.... I went and got a pedi, now if you know me even just a little you know i HATE feet. I rather them be covered with socks, and not just mine but everyone's. I know i know i'm going to work on that with my therapist too. With that said i stepped outside the box and now have beautiful purple toes (that no one will ever see because they'll be tucked inside warm socks).
I then headed home and made an appointment for Saturday, a much needed appointment!!!
Then it was time to pick up the 2 little boys. I always head to get Noah first. It's not time to actually get him until 1 but since thats the same time i get Jo, Noah gets picked up early. Today i received a special treat, just as i was pulling out of the parking lot there she was.... Cassie. Just at that very perfect moment she flags me down and tells me to pull over. I stop my car and feel blessed to have her, she comes over to my car with flowers and a bottle of wine (i think shes trying to turn me into a drinker, but a glass of wine is just what i need at the end of my long days). We then chat and i feel even better than i did before.
I arrive at Jo's school with just 10 mins before dismissal, of course Noah is tired and doesn't want to get out of the car. He arches his back and screams NO Mommy NO!!!! I gently remind him we have to pick JoJo up from school. I head into the school with a screaming child trying to throw himself from my arms. When we arrive outside Jo's class i set my tantruming child on the floor and start conversations with other mothers. (yes i was that mom today, but i didn't really care because i have pretty purple toes) First thing Jo says is i have to pee. I think, really you couldn't have used the potty in your class (my reasoning for this request is simple) the potty is at the front door but Jo only likes to exit through the back door. Doesn't he see how crazy the hallway is??? and that his brother is freaking out??? I meet his request because i don't want two tantruming children on my hands.
We arrive home, i put Noah down for a nap, and start to make Jo lunch. How i wish my kids would eat a cold sandwich (i know i know its my fault and i shouldn't let my children make that choice). Jo finishs lunch and starts quiet time. (its never really that quiet but he knows that its my time) Today i choose to blog during this time. Therefore my house is a mess. I have laundry waiting to be folded and dinner to be started, not to mention the mess in the toy room...oh and the workout that's not happening today. It's never ending and always calling my name. Atleast as i fold the laundry i'll have my beautiful flowers to look at. I'll start dinner just before heading to the bus to get Micah.
Once all 3 boys are home thats when the house really gets loud. Dinner will be serves no later than 5:30 and we'll be headed for tubs at 6:15. Someone will end up sad and/or hurt, never fails. I may even have to pull someone out for a somewhat cold timeout. A mamas gotta do what a mamas gotta do. By 6:45 i have 3 very naked little boys running around telling me to catch them. If ive already put lotion on them this can be a difficult task. By 7, everyone's been wrangled and dressed. We sit and read a chapter from our favorite book or play a game. Noah may even request i read him the instructions to the game.
By 7:15 Noahs in bed, and the other 2 boys follow at 7:30. This doesn't mean they wont come in my room 10 times before actually falling asleep. I will then once again sit down and enjoy the silence. I just started reading a new book so a few chapter of that helps (after the musical on Saturday i think i need to start reading 50 shades of gray). That's it no more no less.
You may ask yourself, does she proof this before she posts it.... the answer is NO, if you don't like it, don't read it :) Have a great day, enjoy your Monday!
Thursday, November 14, 2013
Happiness
What does it mean to be happy???
Happiness is a mental or emotional state of well-being.
I was recently told that others do NOT effect my happiness. I ask myself how can that be. Yes maybe ultimately my happiness is up to me but can't others alter that? Living in a state of negativity can eventually catch up with someone. Just because things may appear perfect, nice house, cars, clean and well behaved children, a happy looking family on a Christmas card is that all it really takes? I ask myself that daily.
I walk into a perfectly clean and neat pre-school 3 days a week where beautiful women come to pick up their perfect children. Are they really as perfect as they appear? Are they hiding something? They always seem to be smiling. What would people say if one day they walked in disheveled and clearly distressed? Would people think less of her, or think she doesn't have it together. Is it somehow her fault?
In today's day an age we hide behind social media only sharing the good stuff and never share the negative. Why is this? What are we all fearing? Maybe that someone may know that were not in a constant state of happiness. Is it a negative thing to not always feel happy???
I think others do effect my happiness i just have to learn how to control how much they effect it.
Happiness is a mental or emotional state of well-being.
I was recently told that others do NOT effect my happiness. I ask myself how can that be. Yes maybe ultimately my happiness is up to me but can't others alter that? Living in a state of negativity can eventually catch up with someone. Just because things may appear perfect, nice house, cars, clean and well behaved children, a happy looking family on a Christmas card is that all it really takes? I ask myself that daily.
I walk into a perfectly clean and neat pre-school 3 days a week where beautiful women come to pick up their perfect children. Are they really as perfect as they appear? Are they hiding something? They always seem to be smiling. What would people say if one day they walked in disheveled and clearly distressed? Would people think less of her, or think she doesn't have it together. Is it somehow her fault?
In today's day an age we hide behind social media only sharing the good stuff and never share the negative. Why is this? What are we all fearing? Maybe that someone may know that were not in a constant state of happiness. Is it a negative thing to not always feel happy???
I think others do effect my happiness i just have to learn how to control how much they effect it.
Tuesday, November 12, 2013
Change....
What is Change?
to make different in some particular way
to make radically different
to give a different position, course, or direction to
to replace with another
to make a shift from one to another
to exchange for an equivalent sum of money
to undergo a modification of
to put fresh clothes or covering on
to pass from one phase to another
to undergo transformation, transition, or substitution
How does one handle change?
Change happens every day, to everyone; it's the one constant in life, the thing that connects us all. And whether life has thrown a change at you or you've sought one out, it's natural to find it difficult. I believe change is positive and everyone can benefit from change.
How to navigate change?
From every change something good will come
Support Group
Anxiety is healthy in change
spiritual strengths
Accept change
Get moving
Take action
Just a few thoughts for today.
to make different in some particular way
to make radically different
to give a different position, course, or direction to
to replace with another
to make a shift from one to another
to exchange for an equivalent sum of money
to undergo a modification of
to put fresh clothes or covering on
to pass from one phase to another
to undergo transformation, transition, or substitution
How does one handle change?
Change happens every day, to everyone; it's the one constant in life, the thing that connects us all. And whether life has thrown a change at you or you've sought one out, it's natural to find it difficult. I believe change is positive and everyone can benefit from change.
How to navigate change?
From every change something good will come
Support Group
Anxiety is healthy in change
spiritual strengths
Accept change
Get moving
Take action
Just a few thoughts for today.
Sunday, November 3, 2013
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